Today is a good day.
And today is a bad day.
I go to the store 3 times/week for work. I buy fruit and veggies and things for us (yes, free fruit and veggies every day). I walk the same way every time. Fruit and veggies – spices – cheese – dairy – coffee/tea – soap – register. I walk the same way every time. This way, I don’t have to pass all the sweets/candy and fall for the temptation.
Passing the sodas, that’s ok. It’s not that bad. When I stand in line to pay, I stand next to the really expensive chocolate. That’s ok too. I can eat at Subway for less money than one of those chocolatebars!
Now, there are two types of “going to the store” for me:
When I go to the store to buy food for myself, to bring home, it’s ok. The temptations are obviously the same, it’s the same store. But I don’t fall for them.
When I go to the store to buy food for work, goodness me… I fall so hard…
Why? I have no idea…
So what happened today? This!
225g of delicious chocolate!!
These are Christmas for me. I’ve had it every Christmas since I was a kid. Then I stopped buying them a few years ago because it’s extremely expensive. I don’t even look for them anymore.
Now, every friday we have breakfast at work (for free). This week it will be a bit more luxorious 🙂 Smoothies, eggs etc.
Since I was gonna buy different things than usual, I decided to get all the heavy objects first – milk, peanutbutter (yes!), carton of eggs, cheese etc. So what did I do? I turned away from the fruit and crossed the section where the chocolate is. And what did they have? CHRISTMASCHOCOLATE!!! My weakness… I hurried away.
I got what I was supposed to, then headed back to get fruit, veggies and the rest. Aaaand I passed the Christmaschocolate again. By now I knew it was there. I could easily have gone the other way, but I didn’t. I’m gonna be honest with you, I was at he store at 12.00 and it is now 18.20 and I didn’t even think about going the other way til NOW!! Why not? I don’t know! I really don’t. All reasoning and logic just went POFF!
After I had gotten most of what I was supposed to, I was gonna get the frozen berries. Meaning I HAD to pass the Christmaschocolate. No choice. As I did, I saw the note. THE note. 20sek. They usually cost about 28-30sek. Now it was 20. Aaand a coupon. With another 7sek off. So they only costed 13sek!!! 13, not 28-30!! I swear I don’t know what happened, my brain just turned off and I forgot the berries and left wih that Never Stop and 2 Snickers… 2 for 10sek. Instead of about 18sek.
I was SO dissapointed in myself… For a while. Then I thought “ok, instead of that, think about it as a an opportunity to learn” and I did. I know I have a weakness for Christmas. I didn’t realize it was this bad when it comes to the chocolate… But now I do! Next time I go to the store (because you know, it’s gonna be there until AT LEAST february!) I will know better. I will know to go the other way, to go the extra long way, and not fall for temptation!
It’s ok to fall. It’s ok and it’s human!
Now. There’s something else I need to talk about here too. My PoTS. Eating all that chocolate IS NOT GOOD when you have PoTS. Oh sweet someone I’m not well!! Like I said, it’s 18.20 here now and I might have to go to bed now. My body is just broken.. I can’t describe it in any other way at the moment.
I have gone through this post so many times now but there might still be spelling errors or gramatic errors that I’ve missed. My brain doesn’t really function – “brain fog”…
Always remember – one time of giving in/falling down doesn’t mean anything. One bad day out of 30 this month is 3,33% of this month! That’s pretty ok 🙂